It’s November 5, 2016. I’ve decided that because I’ve been throwing an internal pity party for the past year (as of last week), I need to take note of the things I want to accomplish, and when I want to have them accomplished by. My intent is for this to help keep me focused on what I want to happen instead of what’s dragging me down.
All this time I’ve felt like I was being strong by not showing my emotion, until they dramatically revealed themselves in my habits.
A year and a half ago, I was living alone. I was the biggest introvert, with occasional ex boyfriend problems. I smoked a lot of pot, I guess. But I wasn’t so into drinking as I had been before and as I have been lately. You couldn’t make me go out, though. I didn’t care to spend my money on alcohol, and didn’t care to be around the people. I would sleep around, but only when the opportunity clearly and randomly presented itself. I was content.
In the past year or so I have~
moved in with four other people, a couple of which have altered, and lots of animals.
been on probation for a year, paying $120 every other week until a couple of months ago.
spent $300 a month on a car payment until a couple of months ago.
lost the only other black sheep in my family.
lost my religion.
lost my purpose and plan.
have developed an immunity to tears.
become completely out of touch with my emotions.
By December, I need to~
have my online class for the Spring set up and be mentally prepared for it.
have saved enough money to afford Christmas, my credit card paid off, and a savings account started to a decent extent.
have a good amount of the things I don’t use gone from my possession.
be on the way to developing much better habits.
Be ready to move out, carrying the smallest amount of things with me.