When you’re eighteen, about to begin college, it’s not very scary. You are surrounded by people all doing this, thing, for the first time. None of you have an idea of what to expect, so it doesn’t really matter. It’s in a way, exciting. That’s probably why it’s not hard to manipulate kids into going to college right after high school. It’s fresh, and you get to know what you believe freedom feels like.
When you’re 23 and attempting to take two classes for the first time in a year or so, it’s so much harder. You already know what to expect. It is exciting to learn. It is not however exciting to learn about something that you’re no longer interested in. It does not make you feel free at all. Nothing about your planner becomes free. You have to work less and school more, making your wallet less free. And its so God damn expensive. I’m in debt for something I don’t even care about.
I’ve never been good at college. Ever. I care way too much about my professor’s opinion of my work, instead of simply trying to pass. This is not a good quality to have in school. I know this. You need to get your shit done and hope you learn a little doing it. If you start to care too much about your subject, you’ll lose interest in it. You’ll see something you don’t like about it and chose something else you’re interested in. No one else seems to care as much. My fucking pride ruins everything.